How to Open Your DMs on Discord (Desktop and Mobile)

"Open DMs" on Discord is not one switch. Discord decides who can message you server by server: for each server you are in, its members can either DM you or not. On top of that sit message requests, a spam filter and friend requests. This guide goes through each one, on a computer and on a phone.

Everything about Discord below comes from Discord's own help pages, checked in November 2026. Discord renames its menus from time to time, so if a label on your screen is slightly different, look for the closest match.

Where are the DM settings on Discord?

There are five settings that decide who reaches you. Here they are side by side.

On a computer, User Settings is the cogwheel at the bottom left. On a phone, tap your profile picture at the bottom right, then the cogwheel at the top right.

By default, Discord lets anyone in a server you share send you a DM. So if yours are closed, something was switched off at some point.

How do I turn on DMs for one server?

This is the setting that matters most. It is the one Discord checks when a member of that server, or a bot in it, tries to message you.

On a computer:

You can also do it from User Settings. In Content & Social, the Social permissions part has a drop-down where you pick one server and change its settings on their own.

On a phone: open Settings, then Content & Social, and scroll to Server Settings. Use its drop-down to pick the server, then switch on Direct messages for it.

Before you join. When you open an invite link, Discord lets you change a few settings before you press Accept. "Allow direct messages from server members" is one of them. Useful when you already know a bot in that server will need to message you.

How do I allow DMs in every server at once?

Use the default in User Settings:

1. Open User Settings, the cogwheel at the bottom left
2. Go to Content & Social
3. In Social permissions, switch on Direct messages

On a phone it is Settings, then Content & Social, then the Direct messages switch under Server Settings.

This switch sets the default for servers. When you switch it off, Discord asks whether to apply the change to all the servers you are already in. If you say no, each server keeps the setting it had, and you change them one by one. Whichever way you go, the quickest check is the one server you care about, with the steps above.

Some of Discord's help pages call this part of the settings Messaging Permissions rather than Social permissions. It is the same place.

What are message requests?

Message requests are not closed DMs. When someone who is not your friend sends you a DM, Discord can put it in a separate inbox first, so you choose whether to accept it.

• On a computer, requests appear in a folder on your Home tab, where your DMs are
• On a phone, a Message Requests tab appears in your DMs when at least one is waiting
• Before you accept, you can preview the message. Images and files stay hidden
• Messages that look like spam go to a Spam tab inside Message Requests

If you share a friend or a small server with the sender, their message can skip the requests inbox.

Adults can turn message requests off for everything in User Settings, Content & Social, or for one server in that server's Privacy Settings. For teens, and for accounts whose age Discord has not confirmed, message requests stay on until the account is confirmed as an adult. Discord may also show a teen a safety alert the first time someone new writes to them.

The spam filter is a separate setting, under Direct Message spam in Content & Social. It has three options: filter DMs from people who are not your friends, filter all DMs, or do not filter.

Who can send me a friend request?

Friends can DM you whatever your server settings say, so friend requests are the other way in. You set them in User Settings, Content & Social, Friend Requests:

Untick all three and nobody can send you a friend request.

If you want anyone at all to be able to DM you, Discord has no switch for that. Someone with no server in common and no friendship cannot message you. The most open you can be is direct messages on in every server, plus friend requests set to Everyone, so anyone who knows your username can add you.

Can bots and apps DM me?

Yes, the same way people can. A bot added to a server appears as one of its members, so the server's direct messages switch covers bots too. With DMs off for a server, its bots cannot message you either, including ones you need, like an application or verification bot. A bot you blocked cannot message you at all.

A bot also has to share a server with you. Discord's developer documentation lists a separate error for a bot that tries to message someone it has no server in common with.

What does "You must share a guild with DMs enabled with this application" mean?

"Guild" is the developer word for a server. Discord shows this message when you try to use an app's command in your DMs with that app, and it will not run it there.

Discord's developer documentation says an app's commands work in your DMs with it only when its bot shares a server with you. The message adds the other half: you must allow DMs in a server you share with it. So you see it when:

• You are no longer in any server the app is in
• You switched off DMs in every server you share with it

To fix it, switch on direct messages in one server you share with the app, then try the command again. Or use the command inside that server instead.

Some apps can also be added to your account rather than to a server. Discord says apps added to your account work in your servers, your DMs and your group DMs.

How can I tell if my DMs are open?

The surest test is a real message. Ask someone in the server who is not your friend to DM you. If it shows up in your DMs or your message requests, your DMs are open for that server.

Why can someone still not DM me?

Discord's help pages list these reasons a DM does not go through:

• No shared server. You are not friends and share no server
• DMs off for that server. Your switch for the server you share is off
• Blocked. You blocked them
• Screening not finished. They have not completed the server's membership screening, the rules a server asks new members to accept
• The content. Discord found that what they tried to send breaks its Community Guidelines

The sender then sees "Your message could not be delivered." Discord says that usually means you share no server, or you only accept DMs from friends.

Two more cases:

• The server paused DMs. Moderators can pause DMs between members who are not friends for a set time, for example when the server sees unusual activity. It ends when the time runs out or when they switch it off
• It is waiting in requests. The message did arrive, but in Message Requests or Spam, not in your main DM list

Why do closed DMs stop you from applying on a server?

Many servers run applications through a bot: staff, whitelist, clan or partner applications. With Mico, pressing Apply starts the application in a private message, one question at a time. If your DMs are off for that server, the bot cannot start it, and Mico tells you so:

You have not been refused. Switch on DMs for that server and press Apply again. Every other message Apply can give, and what each one means, is in why the bot asks you to enable your DMs.

If you would rather keep your DMs closed, Mico has a second way in. The View Online button under the panel opens the same application on micoapp.io. You sign in with Discord and answer in the browser. You still need to be a member of the server, and the same rules apply as on the Apply button.

When staff decide, Mico sends the result as a DM. If your DMs are closed by then, you are not told, but you can always see the status in My applications on the site.

Run a server where applicants keep hitting closed DMs? Letting members apply from your website shows how the web page and the embed work, and the start page gets a ready panel posted in your server with one command.